Feb. 2nd and this sucked.

Putting all those pics of Tom here really sucked more then you will ever know. I have sat and cried the entire time. Goodness I MISS MY MAN! I think the only other thing that would suck as bad as having your husband die is to have a child die. I am changed forever, good or bad that is it. I am different and my life will never be what it was before. I hate not being able to talk to him. Oh people say you can still talk to him, but you can't. It is just words spoken out loud if you can't converse with someone. I hate not being able to share things about the kids with him. Kaitlin's grades suck and I can't tell him, I can't get any help from him, he will never hold me and tell me things will be o.k. as long as we have each other, because we don't have each other any more. Sure, I have a new love but not Tom. Mike can't take his place, just make a new place, and he knows that. So there it is, my tribute to Tom.